Stand my ground
by El loopy
Summary: Evey contemplates going back to see V before November 5th and everything that's happened so far. Song fic. Oneshot.


**What better way to celebrate November 5th than to put up a 'V for Vendetta' fic?  
**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the characters from 'V for Vendetta' or the song 'Stand my ground' by Within Temptation.**

* * *

Stand my ground

_I can see  
when you stay low nothing happens  
does it feel right? _

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Evey sat quietly in her hiding place on her faded brown sofa chin cupped in her hand, elbow resting on her knee. The screen fuzzed and whirred as the 'Count of Monte Cristo' clicked off. In about twenty four hours V would be blowing up the Houses of Parliament. Soon she would have to decide whether she was going to be a part of this or not. She had the chance to start her life again. She had the chance to start her life again. She had a new look, a new name, she was a whole different person. It would be so easy just to sit it out, just to hide in her place and let it all wash over her…but something about that didn't sit right…it bothered her.

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_Late at night  
things I thought I put behind me  
haunt my mind_

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Evey woke up with the cries and screams echoing through her head. Her mother's glazed look, Gordon's bloodied face. She was gasping for air and shuddered violently. Slamming the light on she curled up on the bed, knees tucked under her chin and just sat there shivering in her cotton pyjamas. Quietly she muttered curses and assurances to herself, but as much as she tried to convince herself that she needed to forget, to lock away the memories that haunted her and called her to join V, the more vivid the images became.  
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_I just know there's no escape  
now once it sets its eyes on you  
but I won't run, have to stare it in the eye_  
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Evey's eyes scanned the room where she was staying. The ceiling and walls had cracked plaster and peeling yellow paint, the floor a stained muddy brown, but having stayed in a cold cell with nothing but a stainless steel toilet and pain and fear as your only company…it made the place look comfortable. It had been V's twisted convictions that made him do such horrific things to her…although…they had freed her permanently. There had been only one way to achieve what she wanted and, in his own words, he'd done what was necessary. Was she willing to sacrifice everything she knew for convictions she wasn't so sure about?

Some of his ideas were right and true, there was something wrong with this country, but was blowing things up and killing people the right way? He certainly thought so but everything she'd been taught rebelled against it. Could she support him even if his methods were wrong? Was she going to return to him for the Grand Finale?

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_Stand my ground, I won't give in  
no more denying, I got to face it  
won't close my eyes and hide the truth inside_

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Evey sighed and switched the light off, throwing her covers on top of her, hoping she'd sink back to sleep. To no avail. Despite trying to guide her mind to more pleasant topics it kept returning to V.

Giving up Evey opened her eyes, rolled onto her back and stared up through the darkness, giving her mind free reign. It was no good ignoring it. The fact was this Revolution was going to happen tomorrow and she had to make a decision.

The most obvious question was this: 'Why didn't she give away V's location when she thought she was going to die?'

After turning several theories over in her head the conclusion was unavoidable. As much as she hated his methods, and what this quest for revenge was doing to him, he was right. So she supported him and besides…she was in love with him…so she'd see him before this whole thing crashed down and swept them all away.

There was something faintly worrying about his pleading, desperate tone when he had asked her to see him once more before the fifth. Something about it made worry flutter inside her, but she pushed it away.

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_if I don't make it, someone else will  
stand my ground_

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How many would go? She wondered dimly. How many corpses would litter the streets before this was over? If one fell the impact would be minimal. She knew from listening to conversations, from feeling the mounting tension and anticipation, that V would have a following tomorrow night. Such a following that if one fell another would take their place easily. If V didn't know what he was doing it would be a bloodbath – but she had faith in him. He'd been planning this too long and in too much detail to forget about the people he was trying to free.  
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_It's all around  
getting stronger, coming closer  
into my world_  
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Evey yawned as she walked out her place the next morning, locking the door behind her. Her only purpose was to get a cup of coffee. She'd fallen asleep the night before with thoughts of V in her mind but the previous nightmares had robbed her of much of her sleep and she was tired. She was therefore totally unaware of the other person until they shoved a box into her arms.

"This came for you," he muttered as he passed, carrying a whole pile of them under one arm and shoving them at people as they emerged from their apartments. All wore the same bemused, half-asleep incomprehension on their faces that Evey imagined must reflect her own.

A few started to tentatively tear off the tape and open it. What they pulled out caused Evey to start.

All traces of tiredness gone she ripped the box open on the floor and with great delicacy she lifted up the cloak at its corners, letting it flow and straighten from its folds. She merely looked at the cloak for a moment then laid it over one arm while she bent and carefully picked up the mask. The jolt in her stomach was unexpected and she smiled.

He'd really thought this through.

With deliberate movements she pressed the soft black fabric to her face whilst still gazing at the Guy Fawkes mask and just let herself imagine…imagine that V was holding her.

The fantasy was brief.

Evey swiftly folded up the cloak and put it back in the box, lying the mask gently on top.

It was coming.

The realisation was slowly beginning to dawn. This was happening and it was going to happen in full force tonight whether she thought it should or not.

She looked down at V's gift to England and gave a weak smile – where had he got them all from?

V had everything perfectly planned out. His influence was everywhere, permeating into everything that was familiar in people's lives. He was impacting anything that could be impacted.

Evey ran a hand through her cropped hair.

He'd certainly impacted her, physically, mentally…emotionally…

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_I can feel  
that it's time for me to face it  
can I take it?_

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Evey dumped the box in the corner of her bedroom and threw a blanket over it. Slowly she continued on her original agenda of hunting down a cup of coffee. Everywhere she went people were wearing masks and cloaks. The pressure was unbearable, like the hot humidity that comes before a storm, and she was just waiting for it to break with impatient longing.

It was like that with her torture. Just sitting there, waiting for death and wishing it would just hurry up about it.

A flare of anger shot through her. How could he have done that to her? How _could _he? Forget the fact that it freed her, the point was he'd hurt her in excruciating ways. She clenched her fists. The sense of betrayal was still a fresh wound that cut her deep, the only reason for it healing was her freedom from self fear and her love of V.

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_Though this might just be the ending  
of the life I held so dear  
but I won't run, there's no turning back from here_  
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The torture could not purge her of fear for others.

She knew that V, like her, did not fear death, but that brought her no comfort when combined with the knowledge that he would do anything to see this night to the finale he'd planned.

How many were going to die tonight? The thought re-emerged, only the sense of foreboding increased.

How _was_ he going to stop a mass slaughter? The horrifying idea of an exchange – his life for their's - made her shudder.

Evey reached the entrance to the subway. The street was crowded and busy, talk of the masks and that night were being tossed from mouth to mouth. It was easy to slip under the 'Do not enter' signs and orange tape without being noticed.

The walls were the same as always, the same as when the tunnels used to be open from her dim, fuzzy memories. It was cold but clean. Everything was so silent but for the echo of her footsteps. It was a bit eerie really with the closed boutiques and silent, sleek, metal turnstiles. The only light was the glow of her torch which cut through the darkness like a knife. It illuminated most of the room, so thick and permeating was the black. Evey vaulted over the barriers, dust coating her fingers, and continued downwards, dropping onto the empty tracks.

How was this night going to affect her relationship with V? It was going to change - that was certain. An event like this could hardly not have some sort of effect but how? Would it destroy them after the event that had brought them together dissolved? Or would this bind them more strongly? Either way she knew that this night was going to change everything.  
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_All I know for sure is I'm trying  
I will always stand my ground_

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A little further down the tracks and she saw lights as she entered V's domain and his self wired electricity system. She approached the door with some trepidation and paused outside for a moment, sorting out her thoughts, separating her head from her heart, and realising as she did so that she had already forgiven V for what he had done to her.

She placed her hand on the door handle and twisted it.

Whatever happened tonight she'd made her decisions and she was going to stand by them and by V.


End file.
